The world was all abuzz this week over the birth of a baby. One baby
boy in particular. One prince that will lead a life surrounded by
wealth, luxury, and power. On the day of his birth, I came across
another baby who had a very different life. Stopping at a red light, I
pulled my car up behind a van and noticed the Nevada license plate.
Then I read the sticker across the back windshield in honor of Connor
Dean Lawrence. As I sat there thinking about who Connor might have
been, I saw the dates and even my chemo-brain could count to two.
Connor was only two when he died. I have no idea why but I was
compelled to find out how he had died. I was actually thinking that he
must have had some horrible childhood form of cancer, and I was grateful
at that moment that I had been the one diagnosed with it and not my
children. But Connor was not killed by any disease; he was killed at
the hands of "his mother's estranged husband," said the Internet. (The
murderer is currently serving a life sentence without parole.) That
brings me back to the first thoughts I had on beginning this journey:
life is so random. One baby is born into such privilege and another
baby is brutally murdered. I have the potential to walk away from this
completely unscathed, while some of my cocktail buddies can't even
receive their treatments because their blood counts don't allow it. (I
hadn't even realized that this is, of course, a possibility each week;
it has just never happened to me.) Baby George & Baby Connor. Me & those whose journeys are not so light.
"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times...it was the season
of light, it was the season of darkness, it was the spring of hope, it
was the winter of despair..."
- Charles Dickens
So
my journey continues and I am grateful to be in "the season of light
and the spring of hope." I have four weeks to go and the worst part is
the insomnia and upset stomachs, not much to complain about in the grand
scheme of things. AND my hair appears to be coming in! Although my
head looks like the back of a baby elephant, there do appear to be
little sprouts, even while the eyebrows and eyelashes continue to fall
out. Randomness all around. And plenty of gratitude.
I leave you with another of my favorite TED Talks. Click here to watch Tania Luna.
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